4.24.2018

Happy 3 months, little love.




Somehow my baby is 3 months today! It's completely cliche to say that time is flying by but WHATEVER IT'S TRUE! Anya has grown so much and continues to grow every day. It makes my mama heart happy and sad all at the same time. Also cliche, also true. All I know is that 3 months on the outside goes by SO much quicker than on the inside! It's fun hitting these milestones and realizing everything she's learned in such a short amount of time. Babies, man, they're absolutely amazing. 



Here's a little update....

I love: listening to her jabber... lil sis tells the most RIVETING stories! But I’ve discovered she’s extremely camera shy, so catching it on video is a challenge. 

I can’t get enough of: the way she falls asleep on my chest every morning after I feed her. I can (and do) stare at her perfect, peaceful, dreaming face for hours. 

I’m thankful for: Kendal’s “no-mercy” approach to swaddling... his homemade straight jacket keeps her sleeping through the entire night most of the time! 

I always want to remember: her pudgy fingers stretching and curling as she enjoys her bottle. She’s even started trying to hold it on her own. Already so independent. 



I’m insanely proud of: how determined she is to sit up on her own. She concentrates so hard when she’s trying to get up... it’s actually kind of hilarious. Dare I say, even better than her poop face. 

I always: race to get her after her naps because she gives the BEST smiles right after she wakes up. She is just so happy to see me and it makes me feel like the most important person in the world.

I can't live without: songs to help me get her to calm down and fall asleep. She's already such a King in that nature because she loves music, just like Kendal's side of the family. 
These three work almost every time: Cleopatra - The Lumineers. Lost in the Light - The Bahamas. And most importantly, The Happy Song - Imogen Heap. This one is literally magic. Even when she's screaming, I start the song and hold my phone by her head and she IMMEDIATELY calms down to concentrate on the sounds. Now, I'm not saying it KEEPS her calm because sometimes she is just too furious. But it definitely helps the majority of the time. If you have a baby... you NEED to try this. 



Some other notable developments that I can't think of a clever "I" statement for include: 
  • Anya has discovered her hands and sucks on them ALL THE TIME. Her hands are almost always wet and sticky and have become the first thing I wash when I give her a bath. 
  • She's also become quite the drool monster and is constantly blowing spit bubbles. Along with that, she's figured out how to click her tongue and blow her lips and it sends drool flying everyyyyywhereeee. Hahah so she's twice as messy but three times as fun because I could sit and listen to her make noises all day long. I do, in fact. 
  • Last but not least, one of Kendal and I's favorite development is she's kind of learned to put herself to sleep. If she's calm, fed, changed, and has played a little... sometimes we can just set her in the crib or pack and play with her binky even if she's wide awake and she'll close her eyes and fall asleep all on her own. If you don't have kids, this might not seem that miraculous. But let me tell you, it's awesome. She is truly the best baby. And she's all mine :) And Kendal's, of course ;)


Long story short, Anya is an absolute joy. We wouldn’t trade life with her for anything.  



P.S. is there a way to make babies stay little but like... keep developing in all the other areas? SOS!

4.08.2018

2 whole months


We took Anya in for her two month appointment on March 26th. Although the shots she got made us both cry, it was so much fun to see how much she’s grown! There is nothing quite as satisfying as seeing your baby chunk up. And I must say, she’s filling out rather nicely.  As of now, she is a little over 23 inches long (82 percentile), has a 15.6 inch head circumference (84 percentile), and weighs a whopping 12 lbs 3 oz (71 percentile). I knew she was growing like a weed because she feels so much heavier than she did just a few weeks ago, but I wasn’t prepared to hear she had already gained 4 pounds! She’s growing so fast and though I love watching her develop more into her own little person everyday, my mama heart breaks knowing there are so many things about the newborn stage that are forever in her past.

There is so much I love about the stage she is in right now. She truly has the sweetest personality. Even after she got her traumatic shots, she calmed right down once I picked her up and started bouncing her and reassuring her that everything was okay. Of course, helping her stop crying is not always that easy, but she has so much love in her tiny baby bod.

My favorite way that she shows me she loves me is through her gurgly coos. Everytime after a feeding she has so much to say. I can’t help but hold her extra close and have a full on goo-goo ga-ga conversation with her. Being a mother is the purest joy in the entire world. And being her mother is my greatest blessing.

She’s also gotten soooo smiley this month. It’s extremely rewarding to be able to see and enjoy her happy emotions. A fresh newborn is fun and sweet, but at times she felt like a tiny stranger who only used me as a 24 hour vending machine. Now she is becoming so alert to the world around her and I get to be the first witness as she expresses herself. It’s amazing how contagious smiles really are. When I smile, she smiles right back. And my heart bursts every time. I love the way her eyes twinkle when she smiles. I love knowing she is smiling without even looking at her mouth. She is filled with love and it radiates right out of her little windows to her happy soul.

She still loves her changing table more than any place in the house. I don’t even mind changing her diaper 10 times a day because it’s when I get to play and laugh with her. If my back didn’t still hurt after standing long from pregnancy and delivery, I would stand over her on that changing table all day and enjoy watching her wiggle with glee. I don’t know what gets her so amped about getting wiped down with a cold wet wipe, but it makes keeping her fresh and clean so much more fun!

She’s also learned to love bath time. She’s always loved getting her hair washed and brushed, but cleaning her body used to guarantee a scream-fest. But one day, she completely changed her mind! I’m never going to forget washing her that day thinking, “wow… she’s being so quiet and content… this is awesome… but is something wrong?!” Then I looked up from the faucet and caught her cheesing at me! Ever since then, she just sits there and enjoys the whole experience. It’s been a lot of fun. Now she just starts screaming when I take her out of the bath. Baby girl just wants to be a bathing beauty all day long! She is furious when her bath time is up.
Along with funny cheesing moments, here is one of my favorites. I feed her on-demand, so during the night I wait til she is fussing loud enough to wake me up. One night, around 3 a.m. I woke up to her grunts and groans and got up to go pump some fresh milk for her in the nursery. When I went back to our room to pick her up and feed her, I noticed she had a huge grin stretched across her face. I thought it was kind of funny because normally she isn’t super happy about being hungry. When I sat down and tried giving her the bottle, she rejected it with the most mischievous smile! Hahah she literally just wanted to hang out. She wasn’t even hungry! She just wanted attention and has obviously figured out that if she’s loud enough, someone will come pick her up and hold her. So manipulative haha. But I couldn’t even be mad about it because it was pretty freaking cute. She gets away with way too much because of how cute and sweet she is. Anyway, I was still pretty tired (did I mention it was 3 a.m.?), so I sat her down on her changing table and let her kick and wiggle and play until she decided she was actually hungry. She played for about a half hour in the middle of the night before she took the bottle I had previously thought she desperately needed. I just sat in the rocking chair laughing at how smart she already is. Girl knows how to get what she wants!

Something else noteworthy about this stage is how she lost tons of hair about a month after her birth (she had the goofiest old man receding hairline for weeks) but it’s started coming back in and it’s quite thick! I’ll forever be happy that she got Kendal’s hair. My heart is filled with pride everytime someone says, “look at all that hair!”. I’m just like, yeah… she’s flipping cute.

Something not super fun about this stage is that she found her lungs and she realllly knows how to use them. I know I said she is so sweet, and she really is! But oh my goodness… she went through a week of nearly non-stop crying. That was one of the most challenging things I’ve ever dealt with. One night, she literally cried for 5 hours straight. And it was not just fussing. Nope, it was full on, blood-curdling screams for five. whole. hours. And I got to deal with it all by myself because Kendal was away at work. It’s times like those you have to put the baby down in another room and look through happy pictures and videos on your phone that you actually love that screaming thing. It was also kind of nerve wracking because it seemed like she had somehow forgotten how to eat. Literally nothing would calm her down. By the time Kendal got home, I just plopped her into his arms and peaced out to bed. I couldn’t deal with it for a second longer. I am lucky to have a husband willing to take care of our baby late into the night so I can have several uninterrupted hours of alone time. I am also lucky because that stage only lasted about two weeks and since then, she’s started sleeping through the night, most nights.

As much as parents hate to admit it, crying is a good thing. It’s hard to listen to but it means your baby is becoming so aware of their surroundings. When she isn’t upset by her environment, it’s so fun to watch her interact with the world. There’s a little patch on the back of her head where she’s balding from her turning her head back and forth, observing everything around her. Her little eyes follow Kendal and I all around the room and it’s the best feeling. One of my friends noticed her eyes glued on me while we were in a room filled with tons of people and it made me realize what a special thing that is. She knows exactly who I am and only has eyes for me. She might not be able to talk yet, but she sure knows how to tell me she loves me!

1.19.2018

38 Week Bumpdate

How far along? 38 weeks
Weight Gain? Again, my weight is about the same as last week! It seems I’ve gained about 27-29 lbs through this pregnancy, which is right on track!
Size of baby? Little one is the size of a spaghetti squash this week.
Pregnancy Symptoms? Pretty much everything you can name is at an all time high - heartburn, has to pee all. the. time. , moderate insomnia, exhaustion, swollen feet, nesting instinct, and braxton hicks contractions.  
Must have items?
  • Notes on my phone so I can remember to jot down tasks to accomplish before baby gets here!
Sleep? Not good, not bad, just the usual. When Kendal has to wake up at 4 am for work I have a very difficult time falling back asleep. But luckily one morning when he didn’t have to set his alarm crazy early, I slept soundly until about 8:30! It was amaaaazing. Then Kendal woke me up with a foot massage and I was just so happy I could have cried! However, even the times I thought I was sleeping soundly, Kendal said I moaned and groaned throughout the night. Soooo maybe I wasn’t getting as restful sleep as I thought!
Cravings? I have either craved really healthy or really unhealthy this week! There hasn’t been a lot of in between. While I’ve had the time to prepare and enjoy 3 very balanced meals a day (which has made me feel amazing by the way), I have also found myself wanting to eat alllll the chocolate chip teddy grahams  (haven’t had those in years. Omg they are so so delish), bowl after bowl of nutter butter cereal (brand new! We found them at Walmart and they are freaking good), and Dr. Pepper or cherry coke (it has to be cherry, not original - and I am not a huge cherry flavored fan?) and spicy chicken sandwiches (on more than just one occasion)..... Even though I don’t really like soda OR spicy food. Weird right?? I have also been enjoying more dairy than usual this week, even though in the past weeks it has made me feel sick… for example, one of my go to snacks has been turkey w/ mozzarella cheese and crackers! Or garden veggie cheese dip from Gossners on crackers. Or blueberry drinkable yogurts. And for whatever reason… it hasn’t upset my tummy like it normally does. So strange! Pregnancy is such a doozy.
Anything making you queasy? I mentioned that nutter butter cereal as a craving just barely, but one night after eating one helping too many, I can’t eat anymore.... And looking at the box makes my stomach churn. It wasn’t a long term craving, obviously! But it hit the spot while it existed! Also, one night when my body was super achy (I seriously thought I was going into labor), Kendal and I were watching some YouTube videos to distract me from the pain. Well, we got on a foodie kick and started watching tons of videos about food and I enjoyed it for a while until I saw one that made my heartburn scream. It wasn’t even that gross? It was some concoction of tater tots topped with queso and some other stuff my brain isn’t even letting me remember right now. Haha
Baby movement? Always! Fortunately she hasn’t been up in my ribs QUITE as much this week. But her movements are so big now that honestly they sometimes make me feel nauseous. The only way I can describe it is it kind of feels the same as when you ride a ride like Rocket at Lagoon. You know, that dropping feeling where your stomach kind of soars? Honestly that feeling is one of my favorites in the entire world (I’ve tried convincing Kendal to go skydiving with me multiple times), however when your not expecting it and it’s actually caused by a little (big) baby instead of adrenaline…. It doesn’t settle too well.
Best moment this week? Since I stopped going into work this week, I have had the chance to put all my time and energy into bettering myself and our home before baby gets here! I made a list a few weeks ago and have slowly been checking off items every day, which just makes me feel so good. Checking items off lists has always been therapeutic to me! Plus the weather in Logan has been AMAZING this week! Not necessarily warm, but definitely not cold and very sunny :)))) I’ve loved it! It has motivated me to spend more time in the fresh air which has been so cleansing for my mental state. I’ve gone on walks everyday around noon, listening to uplifting podcasts, and it sets such a good tone for the rest of the day! It makes me feel so productive and content. I also had the goal to keep our sink clear of dishes, especially at the end of the night. It has really made a positive impact on the feel of our home in general. Dishes are easily my LEAST favorite chore in the entire world. Hate is a strong word, but that is how I feel about doing dishes. So keeping this goal has been huge for me! I think I dislike it so much because it is neverrrrr endingggg and it takes up so much time! It is required multiple times a day and piles up so friggen quick. Plus, I really cringe about the way my hands feel after doing the dishes… just yuck! BUT keeping the sink clear has motivated me to keep up with other chores around the house (that I don’t mind doing so much). I tell ya, that nesting urge is alive and real! Our house has never been cleaner. Having the time to make our space clear has kept my mind clear and allowed room for more positivity! I was in serious need of that before this baby comes. Just last week I was breaking down nearly every day about everything that needed to be done before she arrived and it was putting me in a dark place! Luckily I feel so much more ready and happy to be welcoming her into our family in just a few more days!!!!
Weird pregnancy moment? I seriously thought I was going into labor just last night. I was actually really surprised when I woke up to the morning and my body didn’t hurt so bad. I started feeling really uncomfortable around 8 pm and got the craziest urge to clean all our bathrooms and vacuum the carpets and sweep and mop the kitchen. Earlier that morning I had FaceTimed with my mom and I was telling her all about the cleaning I was going to do that day and she was like “Oh… maybe the baby will come tonight! Lot’s of mothers get the urge to clean right before baby comes!” Long story short, I took care of some car stuff that took longer than expected and I was too tired during the day to do the cleaning I had intended. So when my body started hurting, I was like “Ah! If I really go into labor tonight, our house will not be ready to bring her back to!” (even though it totally would be because as I just mentioned above, I’ve been cleaning and tidying all week). Anyway, after I did all that, I got into bed with Kendal and the pains just got worse and worse the longer I layed there. I ended up not falling asleep til like 1 because I was hurting so bad! But here I am, writing this post feeling perfectly normal. As normal as possible for being 39 weeks (today) anyway. So… we will just keep waiting until those early labor pains actually bring a baby into the world! Fingers crossed that’s only a few days away!
What I’m looking forward to? My mom and dad get here on MONDAY! Woop! I can’t wait to see them and I extra can’t wait to see my baby girl! She is so close! I can feel it!